Sunday, November 7, 2010
I have a confession to made: life with Autism sometimes sucks. Okay, maybe that's not a confession but something most would find quite obvious. There are days filled with poop covered trains. Very public meltdowns that make you want to cringe. Sleepless nights, night after night. Being hit by your own child because things didn't go as he had planned- not because it didn't go his way mind you, but more because something is not as it should be- a missing train table in the neighbor's garage he'd only played with once for example. This is of course not even taking into consideration the countless therapy hours, unclear vision of the future and all that fun stuff. Yes, autism is definitely no walk in the park.
Today has been one of those days! (And tomorrow will be too when he realizes that he can no longer put together his favorite puzzle because he tore the picture off of them and attempted to eat them!)
But I've learned that I cannot dwell on these bad things. If I did, I'd probably lose my mind- though some would argue it's already too late for that. And so I write this in an effort to remember the positive. Because as much as I would not wish for my son to have autism, it is a part of who he is and I love every part of him, including those little quirks that make up who he is. Like his impressive ability to memorize songs like its nothing, and parts of movies, and even more recently lines from books and phrases he's heard from school- even if he doesn't necessarily know what these things me. He cracks me up with his Little Rascals scripting! ("I...Stimey...Uh huh") His excitement over the most random of things keeps life entertaining as well...who knew the word minutes could have a child laughing for DAYS? I could go on and on, but you can get my point. As much as I hate days like this, I know that we have been blessed with an amazing child and I would not trade him for anything. So I will continue to take the bad right along with the good and love my son always...unconditionally.